Darks Pasts and Secret Wars
Somehow I've got a bad feeling about all of this... there's something that still feels off about this whole situation and I can't quite put my finger on what it is, even though I have a fairly good idea of where to look. I know what's bothering me has something to do with the connection I've been sensing between Jackson and his companions from the moment I first laid eyes on them... a connection we never even considered while we were trying to figure things out last night, a connection we shouldn't have overlooked.
I told Sandburg yesterday that whatever it is that Major Carter is involved with it is certainly not theoretical but now as I watch the interaction between the three of them in light of Blair's less than subtle revelation I can't help but realize that we failed to consider what that could possibly mean... and that meaning is now growing increasingly apparent. The thing is that all of a sudden I am hit by the realization that we may well be about to get ourselves entangled with something that is far bigger than anything we could possibly have imagined.
Simply put, if the military has made contact with some alien civilization --and by now that's not much of an if, in fact Jackson has all but admitted that that's the case-- then maybe we should have considered what that could possibly entail because, after all, the clues were there for anyone to see from the very beginning.
I knew from the moment I first laid eyes on Jackson and company that they were a combat unit... and meeting and greeting aliens shouldn't have been enough to explain that by itself, not if those aliens were friendly. That was my mistake, the fact that I didn't realize that what these three are involved in is something that is probably far more dangerous than anything we have ever encountered before... and to make matters worse I also realize that now that Blair has revealed that we've figured out what they are up to, chances are that we've forfeited our best shot at being able to back away. They know I'm a sentinel, they know I'm something they can use and they no longer have to worry about revealing their secret to us because they already know we know, because they already know we are on to them. That means we are vulnerable and that is not a good position to be in.
Who would have thought that something as innocent as a letter from Naomi answering some of Blair's questions could possibly lead to such a mess? Well, maybe I should have, after all, we are talking Naomi here, when was the last time that one of her well meaning interferences in her son's life didn't end up turning into a major disaster? When was the last time one of her attempts to help Blair out in some fashion didn't snowball out of control? I've known my guide for over ten years now so it's got to be at least eleven as it is now pretty obvious that this one won't be the exception that breaks her winning streak in that regard.
The problem is that this whole situation is rapidly spinning out of control... and by that I don't just mean that it is spinning out of our control. I can see it in O'Neill's face, I can see that he is about as thrilled by this latest development as I am, not that I blame him. Jackson is merrily spilling the beans and the colonel is not happy about that... not to mention that Daniel seems to be as immune to his glare as Blair is to mine or even Simon's. I can see that O'Neill doesn't like the unknown, he doesn't like situations he can't control any more than I do and that is exactly what we have here: an unknown situation neither one of us can hope to control... and on top of that there's the fact that he is as protective of Daniel as I am of Blair. And that brings us back to my primary concern.
Unfortunately right now both Blair and Daniel seem to be intent on dragging us on a collision course and there's nothing any one of us can do about it... in fact they seem to be totally oblivious to the fact that they are walking straight into a minefield, one that can easily blow up in all our faces. I remember what Major Carter said yesterday about the potential for disaster of these two coming together and I admit that I did try to imagine all kinds of desperate scenarios we could possibly end up having to face, unfortunately this wasn't one of them. I was ready to tackle something like a terrorist takeover at a lab in which deadly pathogens are stored somewhere in downtown Cascade combined with an unexpected blizzard in July... now that is beginning to look like an optimistic scenario because what we have here is something that could easily end up dragging us straight into some sort of secret war and that's never a good thing. I've seen secret wars, that's why most of my missions are classified even after all these years, and somehow I suspect that what we've stumbled upon here would make those missions look like child's play.
I am a cop, I am the Sentinel of the Great City but now the question is, can I turn my back on an even greater threat if I am called to fight a brand new war? And if I dont turn my back on it, do I have the right to drag my guide into the fray? Of course, knowing Blair there would be no dragging involved, he would go there willingly but still...
Maybe I'm worrying too much. I know what I'm worrying about is something that hasn't even been mentioned and maybe will never be but somehow I don't think that will be the case. If I've learned anything from Blair in these past ten years it is that everything happens for a reason and I suspect that this is no exception. After all, what are the odds that Sandburg's long lost brother would turn out to be involved with this war in the first place?
I don't know where we are going, not any more. I like to be in control and yet right now I can feel that control slipping away from me. When I woke up yesterday I lived in a world that was very different from the one I am seeing now and somehow I don't think I'm meant to turn my back on what is to come... not that that's likely to be an option anyway.